Unprepared Tourists

Our second weekend here in Singapore is in the books! This country is so packed full of things to do. This weekend we decided to take a walk from our neighborhood down to the Sembawang Straits. It's the strait that separates Singapore from Malaysia. While it's not quite the soft white sandy beaches we got used to in Florida, it was still nice, and so exciting to think that this is home for the next few years. It was quite a trek with the 2 year old, as it was around 2 miles each way, but so worth the walk. Once we arrived, we were surprised to see that the park itself was just gorgeous. Huge trees all over, and an awesome playground for the kids, that looked like a shipwreck. It was so neat, and a challenging playscape that kept Annabelle working for quite some time! After watching the sunset, it was time to call it a day! We made our way back home, which was endless amounts of fun because our toddler was screaming in protest for almost the entire 2 mile walk!

On Sunday, we decided to try out the Zoo! We have heard from countless people that this Zoo is definitely on the top of the list of things to see. But, as usual, getting there was our most adventurous part! We had to walk through our neighborhood, to the train, then hop on a bus, which would take us the rest of the way to the Zoo. Easy enough, right? Not for us! The walk to the train, and the train ride itself was fine, but when it comes to disaster, our bus trip was one! First, when we were getting on the bus, we didn't realize we should have folded up our stroller before getting on. So, we tried to fold it up, and not realizing we had a basketful of stuff, this took a minute. So, there we are holding up all of these people crammed on this bus on the middle of a Sunday. When we finally got the stroller folded up, we realized we had no idea where our rogue toddler had gone. Whoops! So, we get on the bus to see that she has made herself comfortable right next to a man who looked like he could be angry enough to break something. During the drive on the bus, which was quite rough. Picture me, a tall, large woman standing in the middle of a bus packed with 50 other people, and a stroller, trying to control a toddler that is 5 feet away sitting next to an angry man. In between telling Annabelle to "Stop kicking him," "you're bothering him," "Don't stand up on the seat," "Don't push that stop button," "Put your legs together, we can see your underwear," I realized, I'm also simultaneously whacking this poor teenager in the head with the wheels from my stroller. Oh, and lets not forget the time that Annabelle decided to start twerking on the pole, and made everyone laugh. Holy cow. When it comes to unprepared tourists, we definitely fit the mold! Anyway, we eventually made it to the Zoo, and I was so happy to get off that bus, but still made sure to make it clear that we were "NEVER RIDING THAT F*CKING BUS AGAIN!"

Now that we were at the Zoo, we noticed a line that was so long, I figured we would be stuck for at least an hour before we even got in, and Annabelle was really in a mood. But, to our surprise a nice older woman came over to tell us about the Priority Queue line that is made for people like us who can't control their toddlers! And, we were able to skip the hour long line, and get tickets in 2 minutes! And so we were in! Right from the start, this Zoo was pretty cool. The first exhibit was an open monkey exhibit, and they were close enough to touch! Annabelle was in Heaven, and we saw some great things! Her favorite was probably the Koalas, and she has still been talking about them ever since we left! Once Annabelle started stripping off her shoes and socks, we knew it was time to go, so we made our way to the Taxi line. In true American tourist fashion, we even made getting into a Taxi look difficult. When it was time to fold up the infamous stroller, I grabbed our bag out of the basket and realized that our can of sunscreen had exploded all over everything. EVERYTHING. Thick, white Zinc Oxide sunscreen. Even all over my brand new camera. UGH! Meanwhile, Annabelle is walking around in the Taxi, rolling the windows up and down, opening the doors, and screaming "MAMA" over and over again. When we finally got loaded up and into the backseat, the driver asked where we want to go, and we didn't even know! Ha! So, we told him to drop us off at the mall that was by the train station so we could grab a quick lunch and hop on the train to get home.

Once we arrived at the mall, and decided to eat at Texas (Church's) Chicken, we ordered, and noticed there wasn't one table available. So,we stood there watching like hawks for a table to open, as our child is screaming "EAT" at everyone who will notice. When we finally got a table, I parked our sunscreen filled stroller outside, and got us all seated. I handed out everyone's food, and Annabelle began to throw a tantrum because I wouldn't let her have the entire bowl of chicken strips, that was actually my lunch. So, once again, all eyes were on us as we try to calm down our child and remain calm. Holding back the tears as best I could, I yanked her bottom out of her seat, took her to the middle of the mall, and gave her my "Mom speech." It is so hard to stay calm when all day, everyday, you listen to the same random tantrums over and over and over again. It's even harder when you're in public, in a foreign country, surrounded by people who aren't parents! After eating, we were finally on the train, and on our way home.

Once off the train, we were walking down the sidewalk, when I hear Annabelle laughing about something. This is not usually a good sign. I look down to see that she had helped herself to our exploded sunscreen mess, and had managed to wipe it all over herself! She had SO MUCH sunscreen on, it was hilarious. It looked like war paint. She had stripes up and down her legs, and finger marks on her cheeks, and her hands were completely white. But, at least she wasn't screaming! So, for our mile walk home, she continued to reach into her sunscreen stash, and wipe it on herself, and then we were home! NAP TIME!

So, in closing, I'll just say this.... If our weekends continue on this way, we may be well known on this island! ;)

Trips, Love, and Toddler Tears

We have now officially lived in our new home, Singapore, for a week! Let me tell you, it's been an adventure already, but the real adventure was getting here!

My husband left at the beginning of June, so he could get a head start on the new job, and so I could tie up some loose ends in the states. I had it all planned out- finish off my last month as a Nanny, get the apartment in order and organized for the movers, take a long road trip home to Omaha, and spend a few quality weeks with family before moving across the world! Does anybody else ever get these amazing ideas, and when you're finished think "what the hell is wrong with me?" Well, I sure thought this, and still do!

Let's start with moving day. We were SO excited to move to Singapore, but when the movers came, it all got real. I stood there watching them pack away our lives from the past 4 years in San Antonio. This city brought such great things for us. We had our sweet baby girl there, and made some of the most incredible friends there. It hit me, as they're packing up my kitchen stuff, that I wouldn't have my best friend over for a spontaneous dinner again. Every piece of furniture had memories being packed away with it. It's so wonderful to be able to start a great new chapter in life, but it's so sad to say goodbye to the present when it's been so awesome! Saying goodbye to San Antonio was devastating. I know that we will see everyone again, but not knowing when is what makes it difficult! The friendships Annabelle had with all of the kids she spent her entire 2 years of life with, the friendships that helped me through the first years of motherhood, and a quite difficult pregnancy, these are the relationships that make you realize what a fantastic life you have! And it all becomes real when you see your life packed into a shipping container.

My Aunt came down from St. Louis to help me with the road trip I was about to embark on with my toddler and two dogs. We decided to stop overnight in Oklahoma City before continuing on to STL. Oklahoma was absolutely gorgeous! So green, so open, and so inviting! Our first day of driving was pretty great. Annabelle slept quite a bit, and didn't cry much at all! We went to dinner at apparently the number one rated pizza place in Oklahoma, then we went to this enormous lake and watched a beautiful sunset! The next day, we were on our way to STL! While we were on a turnpike, we took an exit because Annabelle said she needed to pee. So, we pull off at this rink a dink little gas station, and go into the bathroom. It was as nasty as one could expect from a random place in the middle of nowhere, so I just held her over the toilet bowl, and told her to do her thing. When she finished, I went to pull her pants back on, and what do I do? I dropped the Damn pants and underwear in the nasty toilet. GROSS! So, then I had to take her out of the bathroom with her whole bottom naked half hanging out, and search through our fifteen bags in the van to find her replacement pants! Luckily, we made it through the rest of the trip without any drama!

When we got to STL, we took a day off from driving, and had a day of fun! We went to a fun place called Grant's Farm, where Annabelle and my cousin took a pony ride and a camel ride! Annabelle also got her hair chewed on by a llama, and we got to meet a baby camel that was about the cutest thing ever!

The next day, Annabelle and I were on our own for a short 4 hour drive to my extended family in Illinois! This part of the family had never met Annabelle, and hadn't seen me since early in my pregnancy, so we were excited to get there! Annabelle slept for about 90% of the drive, so it was pleasant! Once we arrived, Annabelle got to meet most of my family, and we decided to stay a couple of extra days to try and miss the 4th of July traffic! So, instead of driving, we got pedicures! Annabelle was so excited, because she got to put her feet in the "pool" before they colored her toes!

The next day, we were finally on our way to Omaha! Yay! This leg of the trip was challenging, because Annabelle cried most of the time, and we were getting caught in thunderstorms for the majority if the drive. When we arrived in Omaha, it was so nice to be home again! Spending two weeks with my family made me so grateful that we made that time for them. We also got to spend some good time with my nephew, and that was precious! I also decided while we were there, that for my mom's birthday, she really needed her bathroom remodeled, so my twin and I redid it. It turned out beautiful, but it was HARD and consumed a much bigger amount of time than we anticipated! Nonetheless, our time in Omaha is something I cherish, as we had time to reconnect, and for everyone to get an opportunity to get to know Annabelle!

Now, on to the fun trip to Singapore. We had a short 40 minute flight to Minneapolis, and that flight was magical! Annabelle was so well behaved and was just so excited to be on an "aipay." I was excited, and was feeling so optimistic about our upcoming flights. Let me tell you, I'm an IDIOT! That next flight was 14 HOURS FROM HELL. Seriously, a nightmare. I felt like Freddy Kruger had gone into my archives, found my idea of the worst possible way this flight could go, and made it happen. My child screamed for the ENTIRE trip. Actually, she stopped screaming during the times we went to the restroom. She would run through the aisles laughing hysterically, and running up to random people, touch their screens and say "WAS DAT?" Then, once in the restroom, every single time, she pushed the "call attendant" button, so each time, we got a knock on the door and "are you okay, do you need assistance?" Literally every person around us moved, except for the person sitting right next to me. Oh my Lord. By the end of that flight, we had been awake and napless for about 20 hours, and we still had a 7 hour flight to take. While we were in Tokyo, I watched everyone watching us as Annabelle threw herself on the floor screaming and throwing tantrums for various reasons, and I assured them that this is exactly the behavior they can expect on the flight. I'm pretty sure they thought I was kidding, but I could see the fear in their eyes! The last flight was okay, and Annabelle only screamed for about an hour, but I had to hold her on my lap for the entirety of the trip for her to sleep. Needless to say, when we arrived in Singapore, I was less than thrilled, and not in the best of moods.

But, seeing her see her Daddy after 7 weeks, was the sweetest thing! She ran to him with open arms, screeching with delight! What a moment!

Now we are here in Singapore, trying to thow ourselves into the culture and really make the most of this incredible opportunity we've been given! So far, we've explored the big malls, the Gardens, and the cloud forest! Annabelle has managed to throw several tantrums at all of the locations, and it won't be long before everyone knows our names!

We've gotten a lot of questions about the weather here. I can tell you it is the most dense, wet, HOT climate I have ever experienced. The humidity is so intense, it almost feels heavy on your skin. We are literally glistening, and dripping with sweat all day, and often times need to change clothes. But, this place is also gorgeous, and just booming with wildlife and scenery! We can't wait to share our amazing times here with you! Thanks for sticking with us!!

I cry

I don't even know where to begin, so I'm just going to jump right in. Life is unreal right now. Unreal in the sense that sometimes, I feel like I'm not seen. Like I am so stuck in a whirlwind of emotion and non stop responsibility, that I'm forgotten. I'm tired. Not just a regular everyday kind of tired- I'm "mom" tired.

The lives that we portray in public- on Facebook, around people we know, but don't really KNOW, when we show fake smiles at the store- this isn't real life. These are the moments when people think we have it together, but does anyone know what life is like for others when they're at home? I'm not sure about everyone else, but I can tell you mine is like.

Sometimes, I lose my temper. Over stupid things, like spilled milk. I cry over spilled milk, because that's the 4th time today, and I cry because I get upset for needing to cry. I cry because I need chocolate to make it through a day. I cry because sometimes it feels like I'm drowning in pressure from a million people I don't even know, who tell me motherhood is magical. Sometimes I cry because I cannot possibly do one more load of laundry, yet there is a hamper full. 

Life is overwhelming, and though I know everyone goes through this, I also know that all of us feel invisible sometimes. 

Today, I broke my toilet. So, my 2 year old and I went to Home Depot to get the replacement parts, then headed to Target to grab a few other essentials. After we finally made our way through Target, I loaded everything up, and had about 10 minutes to feed my toddler something- anything- to avoid a meltdown. So, I throw her the "shries" that she requested, and a fruit cup, and head home. When we got home, I realized I obviously returned my cart at target without taking the $50 worth of groceries out! Who does that? Back we go. Luckily, my cart was in the same place I left it, with everything I had left in it! Back home we go. 

When we get home, it's already bed time, but obviously my toddler is still eating. When I turn around to grab my own food, I see the dog is up on the table, helping herself to the remainder of our food, and she had left a nice present on the floor. 

How do you pull yourself together when you feel like you're falling apart? How do you not get lost in the negativity? I cry!

I also cry when I realize it's not all bad... Some days are just plain awful, and some days are just plain amazing. Some days I cry because I can't imagine one more thing going wrong, and some days I cry because I don't know how I got so lucky. Some days I cry becayse I hate being a mom, and some days I cry remembering how long I waited to become one. 

Life is crazy. Life is overwhelming. Life is unexpected. But, life sure is amazing.